If you have no love for others, no desire to serve others, and you’re only concerned about your needs, you should question whether Christ is really in your life. A saved heart is one that wants to serve.
I could talk about how much I love my husband or my family with this post. The fact is that I do love them, but there is something that I love that I can’t separate or rank in order of importance from my love of family. That is my love of helping others.
It pains me not to help when I see a person standing in need. Wisdom has taught me; however, that my recognition of that need is not necessarily my instruction from God to address the need directly.
This is one of the reasons I cannot afford to neglect my time with God. I require study of the Word, prayer and meditation because without it, I would run mad through the streets trying to operate in my own strength.
There have been times in my life that I have resented how God made me. In these times when it seemed that everyone else knew the secret to how to enjoy their lives, I felt anchor less, drifting after what my purpose was and how could I plug into the happiness I perceived around me? I viewed the gift God gave me as a burden and I rejected His call in my life to love others and to help them as He commanded.
I rationalized this to myself saying that too many people in the world abused my love. You have to understand, I love hard and it never really fades or goes away. With that comes a terrible pain when that love is rejected or twisted into something ugly and it was literally unbearable for me at the time because I was trying to shoulder it all on my own.
I became bitter and resentful and then I became physically ill to the point that I was finally in a position to hear God calling me back to my senses.
What He has given me is not a burden that He ever intended me to carry alone. It is a gift that He continually shares with me so that I can serve His people. So while I may feel very alien in this world that constantly yells at me to be selfish, I lean on God to show me when to help and when to rest in Him. For me, this is the greatest testament of love as it exists in my life.
~ Marta C. Youngblood