I used to think that questioning God was a “no-go”. if I ever had a question, I would always hear people say, “Just Trust Him, child” or “He’s never failed you before, and He will never fail you now.” Or you can probably insert any Christian trope into the aforementioned quotes and quips. Here’s the thing though, they aren’t wrong.
But God will absolutely NOT “Strike you down with lightning” if you question Him.
They are absolutely right. God IS faithful, and He WILL always come through. On Sunday we say “Do It Again”, which always gets me in a place of revisiting altars in my life. Times where God has kept my family. Times where God has kept me. Rough times.
Oh…there have and continue to be many of those. But I learned a long time ago something very important.
God is unbothered by our questions. God is not hurt by our doubt.
Don’t get me wrong, God would rather that we believed without question, that we had faith with not an ounce of doubt. But this is where I believe it is a beautiful thing that Jesus was not just God, but also man. As a man, Jesus had to have been well-acquainted with doubt. As a child, wondering when His time would come. As a man, in the Garden, waiting for the end of His life to come. I wonder what that duality was like for Him, because Hebrews tells us that we have a High Priest in Jesus who is well acquainted with our sorrows and our joys. He knows our smiles and what brings us to tears. He understands us better than we understand ourselves most of the time.
And along with that comes knowing that we will have questions. Doubts. Fears. Please note, I’m not saying that it is ever alright to stay in a place of doubting or fear. But I AM saying that in the moments when you find yourself there, God understands. God will never break down in tears because we questioned His plan. He will never turn his back in a fit because we can’t find the resolve to believe in the moments after a really difficult trial.
I believe, rather, that God holds His arms out to us, and if we would run to Him, He would assuage those doubts. Answer those questions. Love those fears away.
Sometimes when my children ask me a question that I have answered a million times, I lose my temper. I send them away. That is an area that I have to grow in to become more like my Father, because as many times as I’ve questioned His path for me in achieving some future destiny, God should have written me out of the will by now. I should have been written off as a faithless, doubtful, degenerate “son” who has been made unworthy by his own actions and words.
Yet God never yells. He never screams. He is patient. He’s not sensitive in the way that we are. He can handle our questions. He can handle our yelling and screaming.
He IS God, after all.
I think in the end, God wants us to approach Him honestly. If in those moments were are angry with Him, He wants us to express that. If we are fearful, He wants us to cry with Him. If we are doubting, He wants to take those away. However, we come to Him, so long as we come to him…
He will love us completely.
If you don’t believe anything that I’ve said here, read Psalms. I can relate to David more than I can anyone else in the Bible almost. I feel like him most days. And it is the Psalms that taught me all that I have spoken about above.
So, be blessed today, fam! And go to God with it all. The good, the bad, and the ugly!