Last week, our homework game changed significantly. Kaylee has additional and Karlee is now bringing home a folder with assignments for the week.

I look at this picture. I look at my life. I look at the cup of coffee sitting on the table. I look at how my body has changed. I look at that carton of Florida Orange Juice and wonder why it’s not in the fridge. I look at the baby boy in the bumbo thinking how fast four months have flown by. I look at my husband being a great dad. I look at this picture that captures our sweet chaos, and I can’t help but say it for the umpteenth time:

I’ve got three kids y’all. That means there are, like, three of them…

As a mom of three, I often feel like I’ve been swept away by this huge parental tide. Some days I ride the waves, and I’m good. Occasionally, I feel like I’m drowning; and every now and then, I feel myself needing to get out of the water completely so I can walk along the shore by myself and just collect rocks.

There are moms and dads who have higher tides, meaning they are responsible for way more humans, but I have three…

I also have three surgical memories associated with each child. My physical core will never be the same. Metaphorically, my core is also different. I’m not the same person I was five years ago. Last year. Hell, last week. I’m just gonna keep it real and say I’ve changed my mind about this blog series a few times already!

I don’t think we realize how essential change is to God’s overall work in us. I mean, daily change. For real. Our willingness and ability to change is the foot that we pivot on.

I gave birth to three children, and from those miraculous endeavors, I lost my belly button and my independence. Through dance, I’m currently working on regaining my core strength. And I’m committing to doing more things for my self …like having a glass of wine in the evenings.

The throughline of my life for the past four years has been all about change. It’s like I’m constantly re-examining my life and deciding what changes need to be made.

So, for the next few weeks, I will be blogging about recent changes in my life, both petite and paramount. I will reflect on changes I have embraced and changes I have fought fiercely, but eventually let happen.

Things change.

People change…

and if you don’t believe change is necessary, then I imagine that you are the one out there…

just collecting rocks.

Clinnesha is a writer, wife, mom, meta-artist, and social entrepreneur who feels most accountable to southern, black citizen-artists, elders, children, and families. Her work is at the intersection of arts, culture, innovation, and community.