I haven’t been able to stop reflecting after publishing last week’s blog, An Open Letter to My Younger Self. I have since discovered a few truths inspired by my own journey:
Don’t be surprised when a child melts your heart. Children offer a different type of joy that many feel they cannot go on without. For this reason, we choose to become parents or guardians. We watch these little people grow before our eyes. They will outgrow your lap and, occasionally, cuddle up beside you. Don’t be surprised when you have to beg them to cuddle. You gently rub her back and realize it’s not the same back you used to softly pat after she finished drinking her bottle. This still warms your heart, but you can’t stop remembering when she was in your lap.
Don’t be surprised when what you thought you’d be doing for the rest of your life, completely shifts in a new direction. When you realize your passion is different. You begin to wonder if you were “off purpose” all of those years. When your calling is in contrast to degrees you’ve received or the dreams you chased. You may have lost some time and/or depleted some energy– but how else would you have discovered this unique path? How else would you have come to realize there’s more to life? How else would you have heard the calling?
If you’re making conscious choices to not repeat negative cycles that trapped your mother or father; don’t consider this truth absolute. If you grew up in a household you identify as flawed, but overall wholesome; absorb this: Don’t be surprised if you start to become your mother. A time will come when you will understand why your mother or father made certain choices or reacted in certain ways. In those times of reflection, you realize their heartache, courage, good intentions and sacrifice. Becoming the core of your mother will no longer invoke fear.
Clinnesha D. Sibley is an award-winning playwright and published poet/essayist. She is the Literary Arts Instructor at Mississippi School of the Arts in Brookhaven, MS. For more information, please visit: http://onepagerapp.com/clinneshadsibley.