What’s Happening Wednesdays: Rain Drops, Drop Tops

I have been seeing “rain drops, drop top” in my news feed all week.  And until today I had no idea what these people were talking about.  Then I came across this article:

http://verysmartbrothas.com/bad-and-boujee/

So, I like Mr. Jackson, googled the video. Unfortunately, I did not love it as much as Mr. Jackson did.

Here are the top 10 reasons (There are definitely more than 10) I hate this song/video.

10) That is not how you spell Bourgie!!! Bourgie  is short bourgeoisie. which in modern translation usually means middle class. Black people often use the term to describe people (usually young ladies) who have achieved a certain status, and generally have a bit of an attitude about what they will not stand for.  I am not bourgie…but I do have bourgie aspirations.  And as soon as i get some money…

Anyway, I’m pretty sure these fellows actually meant boughetto, which is a much easier status to achieve.

9)  Rain drops and drop tops don’t mix!    If you were truly bourgie, you would know that your drop top stays in the garage when rain is in the forecast.  On rainy days, you drive the SUV or the mid-range sedan (an Acura for me), but definitely not the convertible.

8) Nobody counts loose leaf paper.  It comes in packs of 100 or 150 that are clearly labeled. Nobody is counting them.  Sure, the paper companies could be pinching pennies and skimming a few sheets off of every pack, but nobody will ever know.  On the other hand, if somebody hands you a stack of cash,  you sure as heck better count it, especially if you have middle class aspirations, like myself.

7) There is nothing cool about sleeping in a Jacuzzi.  I know these cats are young, but come on, son.  Whitney Houston.  Google it.

6) Speaking of DIVAS. DO NOT come for Macy Gray.  End of story.

5) This is gross misuse of a crockpot.  All of the aspiring bourgie girls I know, swear by their crockpots.  (Real bourgie girls can afford to pay someone to cook, or at the very least have it delivered.)The beauty of a crockpot is that you put everything in it, and when you come home at the end of a hard day’s work, dinner is complete.  If you are cooking dope in your crock pot, i’m just going to assume you don’t have a 9-5, and probably have time to whip up something to eat.

4) Speaking of food,  in the video, they are eating chicken out of buckets.  While there is no logo on the bucket, it is striped with a blacked out face (black and white as opposed to the red and white of a familiar national chicken chain).  If you take a bourgie girl out for chicken, she’s going to order the Chicken Saltimbocca, not salty-ass KFC

3) No true bourgie girl is walking around with an Uzi.  Now I know a few bourgie girls who are packing, but it’s usually, a cute little something that she can fit in her purse.  It may or may not have a pearl handle.  It may or may not be emblazoned with the Greek letters of her sorority.

2) Old girls ponytail in the video.  I hate this for several reasons.  First off, most of my bourgie friends have gone natural.  Secondly, that damned red ponytail holder.  The only time we ever use the red ponytail holder in my house, is if we’ve busted all the black ones.  And finally, bourgie girls buy bundles.  Ponytails are for the aspiring bourgie girls who have to wait a few more weeks before we can get our hair done.

And finally, the number 1 reason I hate this daggum song, is because I don’t believe these fools.  I’m sure they have tons of groupies and nefarious women around at all times, but none of those chicks are the main squeeze.

A good woman, and especially a bourgie one, is going to upgrade your look.  Sure, every girl wants her man to have just a little bit of thug in him, but we don’t want him to look like one.  We want our men to present just the right image…Clean cut enough to have a job, and gully enough not to be messed with.

You know who I believed had a bad chick.  Ludicrous.  Because by the time that video came out, the braids were gone.  He was down to one chain, and diamond studs.  (Still flashy, but presentable.)  Think about Jay-Z before Beyonce, and after.

So there you have it.  I am not a fan, but judge for yourself, friends.

Mama Radford

 

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