Often times I ask myself in the darkest moments why God chose me to give my testimonies. That’s when I also consider my shining moments. I understand that not only does God know His blessings on my life, that I reach a large number of people and touch their heart in some way, but He blessed me as a Wordsmith, capable of striking a chord with both the most studious and/or those most in need of the message.
I have come a long way from the path man dictated by faith that no matter how tired, how bleak, I can not give in. God’s hand is in everything and there is greater purpose that often I don’t see. I know that I am where I need to be at this moment, doing what I need to do. If I lose sight of that He reminds me.
Last week was difficult and as my grandmother would say, the devil was busy. Help could not be found no matter where I looked and it didn’t seem the cards were stacked in my favor as I went from one stressful situation to the next. Then Saturday came and I was shopping with my daughter, thanking God for the ability to buy her the things she needs. What I want for her that I couldn’t have as an older child with two brothers coming behind me. I had just got out the car speaking to my aunt, a breast cancer survivor herself who, just this morning, has become the first of Noble and Mary’s children to walk into her 60th year and I was approached by an older woman and with a teenager.
She said, “Excuse me ma’am? Are you a nurse?”
I stopped talking on the phone and shifted my daughter on my hip before I nodded. She then stated, “You worked on the cancer floor at Memorial Hospital. I remember you well.”
Turning to the young lady next to her she said, “This lady was my nurse when I had Leukemia. She gave me my chemotherapy and took care of me.” Turning back to me she said, “It’s been a while since I last saw you but I want to say thank you. Your daughter is beautiful. God bless.”
This morning I woke up and called my Aunt Tracy to see how she was fairing after a trip to the ER for elevated blood sugar and blood pressure because she continues to have double vision. I encouraged her to seek out a new optometrist and reminded her of the health problems her mother and mine (her sister) encountered early on. I ensured her to not dismiss these issues and pointed her in the direction she needs to take to get answers and proper treatment that were not afforded to our mothers because they didn’t know to argue against initial diagnosis which led to misdiagnoses. Again, as I hung up I thanked God for my education as a nurse and the impact I’ve had on both my family and the many patients I have treated in both Oncology and Hemodialysis. I may not remember every face and certainly not every name but it’s a long list of lives that have been improved by my blessings.
Every struggle is a testimony of what God has brought me through and to. Each obstacle proof of my strength and His power over not just mine but all of our lives. I have no regrets because ALL OF IT is with purpose and is INTENTIONAL.
-L.M. Carbonell