This weekend you will be 10 months and I’m in shock the time went so fast. When I brought you home from the hospital the minutes seemed to tick by at a snail’s pace, reality setting in. I’m not only a Mommy at 35, but I’m a single mother.
Your father loves you very much and one day I want you two to reunite and have a beautiful father daughter relationship. I know if you saw the love in his eyes you may forgive that he is not here with us now. Maybe he will be by the time you can remember. For now, I’m it and it’s going to be okay because you have a Mommy that loves you to the moon and back.
You like salsa music and sing along in your alien infant babble, you like Zootopia, Shakira, and the opening to “The Cleveland Show”. I love to see you bob your head to the rhythm. That is all from him.
Some days are hard because your mother is a nurse and it demands a lot of attention. I feel guilty because I feel like sometimes that leaves no time for you and I. I am changing the tide though little bit because when you are grown and the time gone, that extra hour on care plans won’t account for much.
The world around us is crazy. So much chaos but in our world there is calm and laughter. It’s important because what we see is our only understanding of the world. I want you to fight in what you believe in but never forget to exhale, preferably on a laugh. I will be there for you as long as God sees fit and together little Ducky, we got this.
– LaTisha Carbonell