He was a beautiful specimen. Single, no children, professional, and in that perfect age range. He lived on his own, so he was great at “keeping house” and even making some pretty tasty meals. More importantly, he loved the Lord and was growing in his relationship with Him. He cared for me. I could tell. We started spending too much time together, so THE TALK was imminent… “I’m not ready for a relationship. I’m not sure what I want.” That’s what he said, but his actions screamed, “I want you by my side. Don’t leave me. Give me a chance.” He had been hurt before. It was hard for him to trust again. His heart was under lock and key. I tried time and time again, but I couldn’t break through the walls. I gave up. I left.

According to the urban dictionary forbidden love is when you love someone you can’t have.

Have you ever cared so much for someone who you couldn’t be with? Loved someone who couldn’t love you back? I’ve been hit with those conditions too many times in my 30s. I’m not really sure why I thought that guys over 30 would be more I tuned with who they are and what they want in terms of a relationship. I don’t know why I thought age would magically grant men the confidence and swagger to approach a single, confident woman to tell her exactly how he feels. I was beginning to think that I care too much for people and that I love too fast, but then I remembered that I’m supposed to love others like I love myself. It’s really not me, it’s them. I will continue to love selflessly.

Lovingly,

–Stassi Nicole